She Has More to Fall

I care about her deeply,

But I know she has more to fall

Before she will truly seek help

And maybe seek all that she says she is looking for.

She falls prey to pretty words,

But knowingly or not,

She is a slave to her own emotions,

And this is where she is absolutely blinded.

I can't help her anymore,

I really tried my hardest.

I will always love her,

Even when I feel her drifting away.

Shortly after I met her I knew she was special,

In a different way than any other friends.

But now she is self destructive,

And now she does not care what anyone thinks.

I cannot help her, 

I cannot save her,

Even in the moments I want to so badly.

It is one of the hardest things about deep friendships. 

All I can do is give it to the One who made her,

Because only He can save her.

No matter where she ends up,

May He turn her world around to seek and know Him.

The Art of Anger

I have such pretty words sometimes,
But the truth is most often dark and dirty.

Today my anger has come to the surface - 

Not out, but bubbling up in my conscious. 

When I was in high school I got incredibly angry,

Mostly in interactions with my father,

And in recurring moments I was out of my body,

Looking down upon myself as if I was a separate entity. 

I didn't know what to do with it then,

And I still don't know what to do with it now.

I am at least in therapy again;

I just hope she can help me. 

The Art of Letting Go

From one of my prolific FB friends,
Who almost always posts spot on to what I need,

Who has thousands of FB friends,

So you never know who she is helping.

Yes, she is a she, and her initials are BMY.

I do not know the author of this post - it spread from person to person.

But it's something we all likely need to hear at some point,

Or at least those of us who are natural caregivers.

You can love others and still be at peace,

Care for others and grieve while being whole.

Because it is not dependent on others to fulfill you - 

It is up to you and the One who made you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My friend posted this from a woman named Dee Hollimon. Worth the read.

——-

My mom had a lot of problems. She did not sleep and she felt exhausted. She was irritable, grumpy, and bitter. She was always sick, until one day, suddenly, she changed.

One day my dad said to her:

- I've been looking for a job for three months and I haven't found anything, I'm going to have a few beers with friends.

My mom replied:

- It's okay.

My brother said to her:

- Mom, I'm doing poorly in all subjects at the University ...

My mom replied:

- Okay, you will recover, and if you don't, well, you repeat the semester, but you pay the tuition.

My sister said to her:

- Mom, I smashed the car.

My mom replied:

- Okay daughter, take it to the workshop, find how to pay and while they fix it, get around by bus or subway.

Her daughter-in-law said to her:

- Mother-in-law, I came to spend a few months with you.

My mom replied:

- Okay, settle in on the living room couch and look for some blankets in the closet.

All of us gathered, so worried to see these reactions coming from Mom. We suspected that she had gone to the doctor and that she was prescribed 1000 mg pills called "I don't give a damn."

Perhaps she was overdosing on these!

We then proposed to do an "intervention" to my mother to remove her from any possible addiction she had towards some anti-tantrum medication.

But what happened was a big surprise when we all gathered around her and my mom explained:

"It took me a long time to realize that each person is responsible for their life, it took me years to discover that my anguish, my mortification, my depression, my courage, my insomnia and my stress, did not solve their problems but aggravated mine.

I am not responsible for the actions of others, but I am responsible for the reactions I express to that.

Therefore, I came to the conclusion that my duty to myself is to remain calm and let each one solve what corresponds to them.

I have taken courses in yoga, meditation, miracles, human development, mental hygiene, vibration and neurolinguistic programming, and in all of them, I found a common denominator: finally they all lead to the same point.

And, it is that I can only interfere with myself, you have all the necessary resources to solve your own lives.

I can only give you my advice if you ask me and it depends on you to follow it or not.

So, from now on, I cease to be the receptacle of your responsibilities, the sack of your guilt, the laundress of your remorse, the advocate of your faults, the wall of your lamentations, the depository of your duties, who should solve your problems or spare a tire every time to fulfill your responsibilities.

From now on, I declare all independent and self-sufficient adults.”

Everyone at my mom's house was speechless.

From that day on, the family began to function better, because everyone in the house knows exactly what it is that they need to do.

For some of us this is hard, because we've grown up being the caregivers feeling responsible for others. Breathe, release and relax and let them figure it out. They eventually will.

Know What You Don't Need to Know

I've always wanted to know the truth,
Ever since I was a little girl,

But as I've grown older,

I've realized knowing the truth,

Doesn't always make things better.

Know what you don't want to know,

It's a protection for yourself,

Know what you need to know,

And leave the rest up to the One 

Who already knows everything.

Ruins

I look around and all I see
Burning buildings, barren trees
Hopelessness is starting to wreak havoc
But Son of Man, I know You see
The deepest depths unknown to me
You have planted seeds among the ashes

You rebuild
You restore
All that's broken
From the ruins
You redeem
You return
All that's stolen
From Your children
That's what You do
That's what You do

So be still my anxious heart
All that's gone is never lost
Emmanuel is here and He is faithful
So I won't let my praises stop
I'll sing it from these rubbled rocks
'Cause I know You are good and You are able

You rebuild
You restore
All that's broken
From the ruins
You redeem
You return
All that's stolen
From Your children
That's what You do
That's what You do

You mix beauty from ashes
Yeah, that's what You do
You turn sorrow to gladness
Yeah, that's what You do
I gave glory and honor
For all that You do
I will sing "Hallelujah"
For all that You do

You mix beauty from ashes
Yeah, that's what You do
You turn sorrow to gladness
Yeah, that's what You do
I gave glory and honor
For all that You do
I will sing "Hallelujah"
For all that You do
For all that You do

You rebuild
You restore
All that's broken
From the ruins
You redeem
You return
All that's stolen
From Your children

You rebuild
You restore (yes, You do)
All that's broken (all that's broken)
From the ruins (from the ruins)
You redeem (yes, You are)
You return (yes, You do)
All that's stolen (all that's stolen)
From Your children

That's what You do
That's what You do

Source: Musixmatch

Song by: Mandisa

Look Up

When you're looking for purpose 
And lost within,
Look up, to the One who made you.

When you feel lost and broken,

Like nothing will ever get better again,

Look up, to the One who sees you.

When you're depressed and hurt,

Beyond spoken words,

Look up, to the Healer of all human hearts.

When you're lonely and sad,

Desperate for someone to hold,

Look up, to the One who hears you.

When you're struggling in life,

And nothing is going right,

Look up, to the One who knows everything about you.

No matter your sorrow,

No matter your pain,

Look up, to the One who wants to heal you.

He who sees your hurt

Also knows your anger,

And He loves you unconditionally anyway.

Can Cats Tell When You Are Depressed?

It's been a hard week,

And my girl has been by side,

But she's ten years old,

And so sleeps a lot anyways.

Can cats tell when you are depressed?

Can she tell when I'm feeling down?

I'm not sure the answer,

But I know she helps.