The Games People Play

Sometimes I look at the games people play,
And I'm like, "Do I really want to do that?"
I know that sometimes to get ahead in this world
You really gotta do it.
But then, if those games aren't good,
I am part of the problem and
Maybe if everyone stopped
The world would be changed.

These are some questions I ponder.

A Summer Summary

An ironic thing happened to me this summer,
This summer that I wanted to pass by quickly.
I made several new friends, and reconnected with old ones.
And now I have become engrossed.

I need to get back into writing,
For storytelling is my art.
I need to socialize but also appreciate time alone,
Because it is there that I meet God most abundantly.

This summer has turned out to be one of the best in years.
I participated in more than I ever thought possible,
And gave up one of my most cherished collections
That was holding me back.

All in all, it was a good summer.
Just when I really least expected it.

No Good Outcome

On Saturday two friends got in a fight.
It wasn't fully resolved.
But there is no good outcome
If I were to try and intervene.
Even though I was there.
(And oh how I want to!)

I'm afraid one has been thinking I took the other's side,
And the other I don't get to see.
The one I hang out with most told me tonight
That she doesn't want to talk about the other anymore.

I get that, but also I'm afraid.
I honestly think they will eventually work it out,
But I also know it has the potential not to.
I really pray they can come to an agreement.

Because if they don't, I will just want to cry all the more.

I Hate This Need

Since when did I become so social?
Since when did I become even more reliant upon other people?

In truth, I have always needed other people.
I have always had potential to be a social butterfly,
To dislike times alone where no one can see me.

I have stopped denying it.
I have kind of embraced it.
But I hate this need to be busy every night of the week,
Which is so opposite of my many years
Where I guarded my time alone so carefully.

I still like sleeping.
It is a hobby of mine.
But I like socializing more,
And I hate this need of mine.

I Met The World Tonight

I met the world tonight.
Not literally, of course.
But I did have dinner with drunk government workers
Who are far more worldly than me.

It's not my scene,
And yet it could be.
They are simply human beings
Trying to make it through this world.

They are rough, vulgar,
And one likely skipped out before paying
(Likely accidentally; she was wasted).
Not like me.
They are also guaranteed broken inside.
Like me.

The world is a strange, cold, warm place.
It just depends on where you live in it.

Too Much To Say

There is absolutely too much to say right now,
Except that Robin William's death is a tragedy.
It is upsetting, painful, and yet not totally unexpected.
It is just... sad.

You never know what is going on behind
Closed doors.

I Fell Off The Mountaintop

Words cannot explain how I am feeling right now,
I just know there's a lot of crying and pain.
I thought I was over this emotional stuff,
But last week something was awakened in me,
And this week I fell off the mountaintop.

When I am in the light,
The dark places don't seem so bad.
But when I am stuck in the dark,
Not one thing seems good.

And that is where I am right now.

I Have Known

I have known loneliness,
I have known pain.
I have also known happiness,
And I have known peace.

And today, I miss my exercise buddy.