New Year's Eve

I didn't plan well this year, I didn't anticipate the snow.
So I couldn't make it to the store (I tried) -
Or to the party I was invited to.
But it's okay,
I am at home, with my family
and my sister's (boy) friend from college.
It's been a nice, quiet New Year's Eve celebration.

Christmas

It's my favorite holiday,
and this year snuck up so fast.
Sometimes it's hard to remember the real meaning,
when we have our favorite holiday traditions,
and get lots of really nice presents.
But sharing it with the family,
was well worth the wait.

Tis the Season

To Be Busy!

Summary

I didn't intend to wait this long to post again,
but life has kept me busy.

Most of the month was working on my business project.
I sold all 6 of my throw afghans and 1 baby afghan from it.
My grandma sent me more yarn.
I am doing a free commission for my brother.
The deal was as long as I didn't have to buy the yarn.

At the end of a busy and fast month,
Thanksgiving came with much healing and peace.
It was seriously the Best Thanksgiving Ever.

I finished my Christmas shopping, and went to church a couple times.
(I've seriously been neglecting going regardless of my plans to go.)

Today I went out with my BFF, though I felt like crap.
Because we hadn't had our time alone in awhile.

And tonight I look forward to relaxing with some nice drinks,
curled up on the couch, maybe crocheting,
maybe writing or reading,
and sleeping in until whenever I please tomorrow.

Barbie is Not to Blame

When I was a kid, my favorite toys were barbie dolls.
I have heard much criticism about them and how they make little girls think they have to have blond hair and blue eyes to be pretty.
But barbie was not to blame for my desire to be blond.
I wanted to be blond because my mom and sister are both natural blue eyed blonds, and I wanted to be like them.
Barbies did not make me want something I didn't have, or think that I wasn't pretty.
I didn't think I was pretty, because I picked up on my mother's preference for blond hair and blue eyes.
Environment has much more to do with these issues than any toy ever could.

Sometimes

Sometimes I want to leave and never come back,
To only take care of myself
And not worry about my family.
But I have siblings,
Who I feel a responsibility for
And parents who are broken.
And I know God does want me to cut them off
No matter how much they hurt me.

Welcome

Welcome, November.

You just might be my favorite month.

Surprise in the Mail

Today I got a box in the mail from my Grandma.
It was full of YARN!
I had written to her about a project I am working on...
Which requires yarn.
But I never expected her to send any.
Thank you, Grandma!

I Fell in Love

Tonight I fell in love with one of my friend's dogs.
He is the largest dog you can get,
but super sweet,
and totally loving.
I would take him in a heartbeat.

I Had To

There's a policy in my house, 

Don't ask and Don't tell.

I don't like to keep buying it,

but I can't stand to see him in so much pain.

See, alcohol makes his headaches hurt less,

but I am afraid he is dependent on it

and afraid I am contributing to it.

I don't know what to do,

or who I could talk to,

so for now, I had to

once again.

Judgement

Why does she have to judge me so much?

Barricade

I had the opportunity to go places the last two days.
I was even supposed to go.
But instead I retreated, unable to get past my barricade.
Because sometimes I just don't feel like going out and facing the world.

If I Stay

If I stay too long, I will completely die on the inside.