The Best of Friends

Animals can make the best of friends.
They don't cancel on your plans,
Hurt you emotionally,
Scare you unnecessarily.

They are always there for you,
Cuddling without words,
Tending to the hearts of their owners
Without even realizing it.

That's why some of my favorite moments
Are cuddling with my sweet kitty cat.

The Truth As I Know It

I don't know everything,
But I do know that lies hurt people.

And in the midst of planning for my birthday,
I still don't know all the truths going around.

I have suspicions,
But what are they without evidence.

I have opinions,
But that doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

There's deception in my voice -
An experienced expert can tell.

So it is in my friends' voices,
And with most people I know.

But we should all try to be more honest with each other,
Because though lies can make the world go round,
Truth can stop it and start it anew.

Of Buying and Selling

It seems as if everything in this life has to be bought,
Even job interviews and dates seem like you have to sell yourself.

Recently a really nice lady who sells something,
Has been trying to get me into the pyramid.

I had to "sell" myself to get the jobs so I can earn money and pay my bills.

I have to "sell" myself on dates.

It just gets so tiring.

Sometimes I Wonder

The two friends who fight should not be together,
As much as I hate to admit it,
And as much as I enjoyed our time as a threesome,
They are toxic to each other.

But sometimes now I feel caught in the middle,
Like the child of divorced parents,
And I wonder if they want to spend time with me for me,
Or if they are just trying to spite the other.

They are not my moms,
And I am an adult.
And I recognize that it is more complicated than that,
But sometimes I really hate their competition.

Because their relationship is not over,
Even though they are not "friends".
And I would warn them both to be careful,
No matter if they think I am taking sides with them or not.

I am not trying to take sides.
I try to be careful about expressing frustration with one to the other,
And I know they both like me separate from spiting the other.
But sometimes it still feels like they are just using me.

The Last 10 Years

This June marks my 10 year high school reunion.
Time went so slow the first 18 years of my life,
But the last 10 have gone so fast.
It has taught me that life does indeed go fast.
And that, like the cliche, I need to live, laugh, and love.

I Think I Blew It

I need to remember to be outgoing

To show the world my fun self

Even when I am sober

Instead of reverting to my shy, quiet self

It is a part of me,

And no matter how much it could be a show,

I am just trying to share my good side,

That I want everyone to see.

I Don't Know How To Feel

I don't know how to feel,

About anyone or anything.

I thought this was a teenage thing,

But no, it never really went away.

I mean, parts got better.

At least there's that.

But things happen, 

And I can't control it,

And I don't know what to do,

Or how to feel.