It Still Feels Like Rejection

I get that it's not about me,
That she needs more time alone,
And that though she initiated it,
She now knows she cannot handle it.

It still feels like rejection.

It was a dreary rainy day,
With fall thunderstorms in play,
And a busy afternoon,
With frustration at my fitting.

It feels like depression.

She told me she needs more alone time,
Though I've gone to her place
Almost everyday since July
At her suggestion and invitation.

It still feels like rejection.

It hurts, and I am sad.
But I will get over it.
I am not mad, like she thought.
I listen to painful songs that speak my mood
So I can get over it.

I definitely feel my try of suppression.

It's not about me, she says,
And I rightly know it's not.
I am now more extroverted,
And she is only more outgoing.

The outgoing girl who needs time to herself.

I get it, I really do.
But I can't help but feel like
I am being rejected.